Come here, baby, and kiss me like you mean it.

JER: So here's the latest: Lauren's currently at 3 centimeters. She's going in Monday for a look and if she's at 4, they're going to go ahead and induce. There's a pretty good chance I'll have a niece on Monday.

CAREY: Whoa! That's so awesome. Is she scared?

JER: I don't know, I forgot to ask. She's going to the same hospital in Columbus where Tom & Christie had Turner. Unfortunately, it's about an hour away.

CAREY: An hour! That's too much, what if something happens?

JER: Like what?

CAREY: Like the baby! What if she has to have the baby on the way?!

JER: Well, I think you usually have more than an hour once labor begins.

CAREY: You never know. Don't forget, lots of babies are born in taxi cabs.

JER: ...I don't think any babies are born in taxis, Sweetie.

CAREY: Are you kidding me? It happens all the time!

JER: Well, yeah, on TV.

CAREY: It happens on TV because it's a real situation. You think they just pull that out of thin air?

JER: No, I think it's a convenient way to put the Fresh Prince in a situation where he has to deliver a baby on the way to a Lakers game.

CAREY: Ha ha ha haha! "Fresh Prince!" Where do you come up with these?

JER: I don't know. Either way, though, Lauren's going to call me Monday and tell me what's up.

CAREY: I'm sure she'll do just great.

JER: Oh yeah. Little "Ellie Martin."

CAREY: Mm.

JER: ...

CAREY: ...heheh heheh...

JER: What.

CAREY: ..."Fresh Prince"...

I talked to Lauren this morning and she is at 4 centimeters (JeremyBear.com: Your #1 News Source for Late-Breaking Cervix Updates!), and the doctor has her definitely scheduled to induce tomorrow.

Love ya, Laur. Hang in there. Can't wait to hear how it went.

---

All right, my conscience can't withstand any more. I can no longer pretend that my "Did Ya Know?" feature up there in the corner was an entirely original idea. While the individual factoids are indeed my invention, the original concept came from Dirk Voetberg, the funniest guy alive.

See?

Sorry, Dirk. Try to take it as a compliment.

---

Go Veg!

Since my Great Lent Experience last year was such a ripping success, I decided to give it a go again this year, raising the stakes slightly.

This year, for Lent, I'm a vegetarian.

Not vegan and a not a true hardcore vegetarian in the strict sense (I'm allowing no more than one meal a day with some sort of fish), but close enough. Looking at my calendar, we're already halfway through Lent and I haven't slipped up yet.

It's hard, but the wife is thrilled, needless to say. I'm already fitting into pants I thought were lost causes.

And I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel pretty darn good lately.

Veg! Who knew?

---

Carey's a week into Cosmetology and a week out of Virginia Country Club. Our Lives v.2 begins now.

Mostly, she's enjoying it. It's not easy being the only person in class whose age doesn't end in 'teen, but she's making due and I have no doubt the whippersnappers will soon be riding her coattails. Each day she comes home with a wealth of information about cutting, coloring, perming, sanitizing and all things gussy-up-ish.

More and more, this seems to be a good move. Care was drowning, she really was, and I can't remember the last time I saw her so positive about anything.

Plus, I get to be Mr. Bread Winner, at least for the moment. We've had brief periods of living only on my freelance (ex. when we headed West), but it's never lasted more than a handful of months. Now, though, it's on me for the medium-term future. So, I'll be busily picking up freelance where I can and concentrating on not getting fired from my day job.

Anyhow, a week in and it's her Spring Break already, so she has the week off. To get into the spirit of things, Carey will be making a brief, topless appearance on Wives Gone Wild XII: Long Beach Nights. Well, either that or she'll be putting plans together and buying materials to redo our kitchen.

Spring Break! Woo!

---

Um, just for you, dear, I've spotted a really terrific NPR concert by The Magnetic Fields, streaming and free to all.

(If it's not already obvious, I friggin' love the Fields. Their rendition of Yeah! Oh, Yeah! in this show makes me want to see them live.

Someday.)

---

In case anyone's curious about the types of things I've been working on lately, I've been putting together a dandy lil' sumtin' for Toshiba. They decided it would be in their best interest to market their Xario ultrasound device through the use of comics and superhero weirdness, so I was tasked to come up with "a comic book that talks and moves" for those fine folks.

So, enlisting the illustrative help of Joe St.Pierre (Spider-Man, Green Lantern, Bold Blood), and composer/sound designer extraordinaire Andy Ryckaert (not to mention a lil' creative direction from Drew), I cobbled together the first of what will be 6 episodes, released over the course of the next several months.

Art by Joe, music and sound design by Andy, voice work by the inimitable Don Ranson, Carrie Gordon and Tony Carnaghi... script, editing, animation and art direction by yours truly... it's my first official experiment with Adobe After Effects. Be kind:

Xario!

---

Finally, for those who don't already know, Carey and I put in a briefer-than-brief appearance in Akron last week to attend Uncle Harry's funeral.

I'm really glad we made the trip. It meant a great deal to Grandma and Grandpa... and, frankly, it meant a great deal to me too. In the end, I wound up saying a few words at the funeral service (I read my previous blog posting, actually). Had a little difficulty getting through it, as I did have terrific affection for ol' Uncle Harry, but it turned out to be a really good, really important time to say goodbye.

And, lending a surreal sort of symmetry to the day, I finally met my only blood nephew, Parker Isaac Burtoft, hours before saying goodbye to my only blood uncle. He's a really terrific kid, and cute. I wish I'd had more than a handful of hours to spend.

A few pics, all with Parker: