JeremyBear.com

Wednesday, August 13, 2003

Home again.

Through no fault of our friends and family whatsoever, the past week has been the most stressful vacation I can remember. Nice to see everyone, but I managed to waste the whole trip worrying.
...

Lauren's wedding: Really, it went off beautifully despite the ineptitudes of everyone's least-favorite wedding coordinator. The woman actually spent some of the time frantically trying to get ridiculous answers to questions already dealt with out of the groom (and, I'm assuming, the bride as well). Most memorable screwed-up moment during the ceremony:
WEDDING COORDINATOR: What are you doing?! You just did it wrong!

ME: I just did what wrong?

WEDDING COORDINATOR: You just escorted the bride's parents down to their seats! It's too early!

ME: No, I didn't. The bride's parents are over there. I'm following the schedule: Pachabel's Canon begins, I escort the Grandparents, then return for the Step-Parents, then Steve escorts his parents, then I escort the bride's mom. Those were the bride's step-parents I just escorted, see?

WEDDING COORDINATOR: But, you didn't wait for Steve to escort his parents!

ME: I'm not supposed to! Those were the step-parents!

WEDDING COORDINATOR: No, those were... wait... no, those were the step-mom and the dad of the bride, I think.

ME: (fuming) Did you know that I'm the brother of the bride?

WEDDING COORDINATOR: (starts to flip through her schedule) ...uh...

ME: That means that the BRIDE'S parents happen to be MY parents, so I'm fairly sure I'd recognize them. Those two people standing over there are, truly, my mom and dad. I'm going to escort my mom as soon as Steve is finished escorting his folks in about fifteen seconds. I'm not going to bother escorting my dad because he's ESCORTING THE BRIDE. Remember?

WEDDING COORDINATOR: Well... hold on... maybe... it seems like the wrong order...

ME: No, we went over it several times last night. How about if you go figure it all out for yourself because I'm done speaking with you now.
Yeah, I was mad. Still, nice ceremony, fun reception and... and my baby sister's married.

I don't think it really hit me until I was standing up there, listening to her recite her vows that this really was it: Lauren was a bride. We're all married now. Funny, that.

And, as is appropriate at weddings, I guess I got a little nostalgic and I started to remember. And, even stranger, my memories ran in reverse...

And I saw Lauren walking away from her groom, backwards down the aisle, radiant.

And I saw myself packing a moving truck and making the long, backward trip from Long Beach to Columbus, where I'd live for the next two years. We gave back our cats to their owners... first Calliope, then Gilbert a year later.

And in 2001, Erin, my other sister, un-married her husband Greg. Several months later, in 2000, I moved from Columbus to North Canton and un-married Carey.

And I was hired and fired, hired and fired, until eventually I went back to college.

And in 1995, my relationship with Carey, my girlfriend of several years, ended. I'd never see her again and I'd never know what I'd be missing.

And I left college for high school, when my parents decided to get together.

And our family moved around, backwards. Marietta, Georgia... where I began to neglect my interest in art. Then Akron, Ohio, where I grew smaller and smaller and smaller and eventually stopped remembering how to do all those things that most folks take for granted, like riding a bike or writing or reading or speaking.

And then Lauren was a baby. And then there was no Lauren. And then Erin was a baby. And then no Erin.

And, through it all, my parents grew to love each other more and more. And all of their mistakes and all of my own mistakes undid themselves. And all the things I'd learned gradually disappeared.

And then there was no me.

And...

And eventually I was in Akron again, watching my baby sister marry a very, very good guy named Steve. It was a great day. I was proud of her and I guess I found myself a little thankful for all those mistakes, all those failures, all those wonderful, awful times. Because, well, it had all led to this day, this time, and I daresay it was all worth it.

Congratulations, Lauren and Steve. I'm really happy for both of you.
...

Anyhow, after the wedding, we hopped down to our old stomping grounds in Columbus for a day and a half. Visited the old church (which is still the greatest group of folks ever in the history of ever). Hung out with some desperately-missed friends (Tom & Christie Burns, Dave & Renee Reinke, Dave & Johanna Matheny). Eventually, we went back to Akron.

Grandma and Grandpa Spellman treated us to dinner, which was an adventure. Visited Uncle Harry, whose Alzheimer's continues to progress, in the nursing home. Seeing him was bitter-sweet and part of me wonders if I'll see him again.

Said our good-byes to Mom, Dad, and their respective families.

Rode a plane from Cleveland to Denver to LA. Got home to two very nervous cats who looked as though their owners had betrayed them for the past week.

And now (shh!) I'm at work, posting. I should probably do what I'm being paid for, so I'll detail our house closing adventures and car-totalling ills later.

Oh, and we're moving in four days. And nothing's done. Thinking about it makes me a little ill.

So, that's it.

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