Pneumatica!

Lately I've begun yelling "Pneumatica!" at my wife for no reason at all. Like last night, when I arrived at home:

CAREY: Today was long and stressful, Jer. I think I really need a hug.

JER: Aw, I'm sorry, babe. What happened?

CAREY: Well, the whole day, everyone kept... Jer.

JER: Yeah?

CAREY: Aren't you going to hug me?

JER: Pneumatica!

And while we were making dinner:

CAREY: I poured us both iced tea.

JER: Thanks, I'll get them.

CAREY: The green glass is mine.

JER: Mm. Hon, why do you always get the bigger glass? I think it's safe to say I drink more than you do, but I always end up with the little glasses or the tumblers.

CAREY: I like the green.

JER: Yeah, but even if there aren't any green, if there are two different glasses, mine is always smaller. Haven't you noticed that?

CAREY: Well, I don't know, but this time the little glass happened to be the one that had your ice in it.

JER: "My ice?" What's different about my ice?

CAREY: It's the ice that accidentally fell on the counter before I put it in the glass.

JER: ...

CAREY: ...

JER: Pneumatica!

It seems to be the perfect punctuator. I'm waiting for it to catch on, but I probably shouldn't hold my breath.

---

My sister told me that she really enjoys reading the conversations I transcribe for entertainment's sake. So, just for her, here's another one.

(Back story: A couple of weeks ago, I journeyed up to Golden West to have Carey cut my hair during her class hours. She gets credit and I get a free haircut. As you can imagine, Carey's class is filled with girls that are mostly, well, younger than Carey.)

MICHELLE MICHELLE: Hi, husband!

JER: Erm. Hi.

MICHELLE MICHELLE: Aren't you Carey's husband?

JER: Yep. Hello. Sorry, I don't remember your name.

MICHELLE MICHELLE: I'm Michelle Michelle! It's actually Michelle Michel, but you say it "Michelle Michelle"!

JER: I'm Jeremy.

MICHELLE MICHELLE: Omigod, do you go here?

JER: As in, am I a student? No. Just Carey.

MICHELLE MICHELLE: If you were a student, would you vote for me?

JER: Um.

MICHELLE MICHELLE: I'm running for Homecoming Queen 2006, baby! Yeeeahhhh!

JER: Wow.

MICHELLE MICHELLE: Maybe the public can vote. Sara, can the public vote?

[Sara shrugs]

MICHELLE MICHELLE: I bet they can totally vote. Can I count on you?

JER: Ah. Sure. You obviously really want it.

MICHELLE MICHELLE: It would be awesome! Or, ooh! Do this: Sign up for one class, something dumb like typing. You totally don't even have to go. But you'll be registered as a student. Then your vote totally counts!

JER: Well, that makes sense.

MICHELLE MICHELLE: If anybody asks if you're a full-time student, just tell them you are and show them your registration and by the time anyone knows that you're part-time not even taking the class it'll be no big deal because your vote will have counted!

JER: Sounds a little complicated, but I suppose it's a small sacrifice if the glory of the crown is at stake. For Michelle.

MICHELLE MICHELLE: Michelle Michelle! I want it so bad!

JER: Um.

MICHELLE MICHELLE: So what do you do for a job?

JER: I'm an illustrator and a multimedia designer.

MICHELLE MICHELLE: An artist?

JER: Yeah.

MICHELLE MICHELLE: So you draw?!

JER: I do!

MICHELLE MICHELLE: So do I! I have sooo many drawings!

JER: Oh yeah? How do they look?

MICHELLE MICHELLE: They KICK ASS!!

JER: Oh, good.

MICHELLE MICHELLE: WOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

I can't help but think, though, that this is how the conversation should have gone:

MICHELLE MICHELLE: Hi, husband!

JER: Erm. Hi.

MICHELLE MICHELLE: Aren't you Carey's husband?

JER: Pneumatica!